Advent

I love Advent, I love the waiting in hope and joy. Alex has made a small advent wreath and we light a candle each night.

Isn't it an evocative word...waiting. How suitable that the reading at Mass was about waiting ...for His coming again.

Come Lord Jesus.

Challenged

For my birthday my daughter bought me "Jesus of Nazareth" by Pope Benedict. I was very pleased to get it but to my horror and surprise she said to me that she'd bought it to remind me that my focus should be on Jesus and NOT on the church or the Pope! I assured her that Jesus WAS my focus and that the Church is basically just a vehicle to get me closer to Him. I think she accepted that.

But I felt challenged and spent a couple of days searching my heart because I know it can be easy to slide into making things like the liturgy, or the priests, or even something like the rosary the centre of our devotion. But after much prayer and thought I feel sure that although I love all these things, and many other aids to devotion, they are NOT where my heart is, they truly are vehicles to Him who is my Lord.

Thank God.

Acts of Love

I have a real longing in my heart to be able to share what He means to me. The Catholic life can often seem to be a series of rules: Go to Mass on Sundays, fast on Fridays, fast before Communion,. but really they are little acts of love. He gives us so much and in return we give him our tiny offerings to show our love, like a child offering her mother a flower out of the garden. And each 'rule', if kept with love, will expand our hearts and make us love more.

What joy He offers us if we'll take it.

His Presence

I'm not really called to meditation: I'm more your intercessor, but just now and again, I find myself sitting silently in His Presence. It's usually when I'm have my prayer time or during Mass, or after Communion and it something He invites me to do. Inner silence and Him.

It doesn't happen often, and it's very short but when it does...what could be sweeter?


I delight to sit in His shade and His fruit is sweet to my mouth. (Song of Songs).

All Saints Day

It's The feast of All Saints today and I have been with the saints all day. First to Mass, then saying the litany of the Saints whenever I can. It's amazing to spend the day with the saints. All so holy yet all so different.

I told my grandchildren about their name saints and they were very interested.

Being Holy 3

I love the lines in Romans 12 when St Paul write about offering our bodies as a living sacrifice to God, holy and and pleasing to Him, and a true act of worship.

AMEN and AMEN.

Is trying to do that being holy?

I have many questions but few answers. This may be another piece in the puzzle.

But I am trying to to DO and PRAY rather than merely ponder.

Icon Corner

We have an icon corner in our dining room. It's just a small corner with a small table on top of which is candle of the colour of the day and a rosary. On the one of the walls we have large 'real' icons of Our Lord and one of the Blessed Mother. On the other wall we've hung smaller icons my husband made for me of St Michael,because my husband was called Mike when he was young and our son is Michael; one of St Anne, whom I ask to pray for my grandchildren as she was the grandmother of Jesus; St Joseph for all the Fathers in our family and Blessed Melchizedek to help us pray for priests.

I often say my morning prayers sitting on a chair in front of our lovely corner but occasionally, during the day, I say a brief prayer standing very close 'inside' the icon corner and I almost feel as if I'm in a tiny beautiful chapel. It's a very blessed and lovely feeling.

Praise you Lord my God.

Being Holy 2

I say this prayer every day, in fact quite often during the day:

Jesus, meek and humble of heart, make my heart like unto thine.

Is that a help towards being Holy? If we sincerely pray to become like Jesus, surely over time we will become holy like him? But we'll never know of course. We'll never wake up and think one morning "Hey! I've made it! I'm now Holy!" We just have to pray, and try, and trust. And I guess take our eyes off ourselves and fix them on Him.

Such a long way to go...but he's with us.

Being Holy

At Mass this morning Father Marcus said in his sermon that we are all called to be holy. It's quite a scary thought really. Sometimes, when we think about being holy, we imagine someone very pious and other worldly; someone who is too busy praying to have a laugh. Or someone so very, very good that the humble sinner's mind reels at the thought of how far we are away from it, and how far we have to go. So we give up, shrug our shoulders and decide we'll still go to Mass on Sundays and say the odd prayer but we still want to enjoy this world and we have our life to lead. Perhaps we even think that God will have to make do with that!

I haven't really sorted out what being holy means, and I'm going to think and pray about it. I begin by feeling sure that it has something to do with love.

Latin Mass

I love my Latin Mass so much. The Mass is the Mass no matter what language it in, but what I specially like about the Latin Mass is that it all about God and Jesus. I sometimes think we forget what the true focus of Mass should be with the busy busyness of the New Mass. Who are the readers and will they read well, what about the kind of hymns the choir have chosen? Will they be uplifting or ultra modern and banal? What about the eucharistic ministers? All women AGAIN! I hope the priest won't feel he has to make a weak joke again. What a racket people are making before Mass, it's like being at the zoo! All bad thoughts and I repent of them...again...and again.

At the Latin Mass (low Mass) there is silence when you walk in. People are kneeling and praying, silently. There is an atmosphere of peace and expectation. The priest and altar server come in. There is no "Good morning everyone. See the All Blacks did well again. So we can thank God for that." No, we have serious, holy, cosmic business to attend to. The priest turns the same way as we do and together we face God.

For a whole blessed hour our thoughts are on God and on the stupendous miracle happening on our altar. In silence, apart from the ringing of bells and the quiet voices of priest and acolyte our thoughts are as one. We are a community, a people of God, adoring.

Then it's all over, we go outside, laughing and sharing our news,

Thank you dear Jesus.

When I can't pray.

Sometimes it's hard to pray when you feel ill and tired. Sometimes I can't pray, then worry that it's not that I can't but that I won't.

Do I feel a God who lets me feel so ill doesn't deserve to be prayed to , or that when my energy is at such a low ebb that I can't be bothered? I don't know the answers to these questions...and my brain feels fuddled.

But I don't MAKE myself pray...though maybe I should. I 'offer it up' and I shoot up the odd prayer: Help me...Come Holy Spirit...Father I put myself in your hands...Dear Mother pray for me...I'm sorry... I still love Him and try to obey Him except I don't follow my usual prayer schedule.

I'm too tired to think, so I put myself in His hands, and relax.

Grandchildren Joy

What a delight grandchildren are - especially when they are young. Our 2 youungest grandchildren come to us 4 days a week after school for 2 hours. We totally love having them. All that energy! I get to take them to their dancing classes which I really enjoy and sometimes their piano class (8 year old) and flute class (9 year old) which I love even more. BUT I don't have to supervise their practising the instruments, or provide the clothes for their dance exams and concerts. I get all the good bits. When we go round to their house they always give us a concert; dances and instruments. That is always such a joy as they usually practiced hard for us.

Once a week we have ART afternoon, when they and my husband do art together. They both adore that and so does Alex.

So yes, we love it, although we know they will one day outgrow us, but we just enjoy them while we've got them. Thank you Lord

Rosary Walk.

If you are the kind of person who enjoys killing two birds with one stone (what a wierd expression that is) then a rosary walk is for you.

I try to have a rosary walk every day - though sometimes the weather or health intervenes. The rosary walk is simple and improves your physical and spiritual health. The first thing is to have a 'tenner' a one decade rosary. These are so small they can be concealed in one hand. Then go for your walk around your neighbourhood (I aim for 30 mins) with your almost invisible tenner in your hand and as you walk, you silently pray the rosary. I love it. I often fantasise about the concept being widely used by Catholics. Imagine every Catholic walking daily around the streets quietly saying the rosary. It would transform the church and what would all that prayer in our streets do for our towns and cities? It would also be a silent witness to those who have the perception to realise what we are doing. I'm praying that one day it will happen.

traditions 2

In my bedroom I have a small prayer table. On it I have an icon of our beloved Lord, a beautiful rosary my daughter bought for me and a small statue of our Blessed Mother. Above it is a equally small crucifix. I love to put a quiet, unobtrusive symbol of the current feast day on the table. For example at the recent feast of Our Lady's Birthday I put a tiny wreath of red rose buds at her feet with prayer - a Hail Mary and a soft "Happy Birthday Blessed Mother." Later this week at the feast of The Triumph of the Cross I will adorn my crucifix with the roses and pray for sinners.

I love keeping these traditions, they teach us to be mindful of what it is happening in our universal church, and help us to live our lives in communion with Our Lord, His angels and His saints.

Traditions 1

Over the last few years I have started keeping more the traditions of the church and am amazed at the effects it has on my spiritual life. I have long kept Sunday as a day of rest from sunset (or 5pm)on Saturday to sunset (or 5pm) on Sunday. We really do need a day of rest to recharge our batteries as our God clearly knew. I have also started a minor fast on Fridays - at my age I think a true fast would not be healthy for me, though I do keep it on Good Friday and Ash Wednesday.

We also light a candle as we pray at our prayer table before our evening meal and I try to have a candle in the church colours of the day. It seems to bring me so close to the Universal Church.

Spring

Today is the second day of spring and it was a beautiful day; sunny and dry. Glorious after all the winter murk. But to remind us that we aren't really free of winter yet it was very cold, in fact there is going to be a frost tonight according to the weather forecast. But it was a foretaste, a glimmer, of what is to come. I much prefer spring to summer, which is too hot for me. I guess it is a example of the old adage that it's better to travel hopefully than to arrive! This saying does not apply to going to Heaven of course:-)

Father Tom

Our dear Father Tom has just come back from a retreat in Australia. I was so pleased to see him on the altar this morning and I thanked God for his safe return. He is a great priest and has a lovely warmth of manner. When he preaches he holds the Bible so he can flip backwards and forwards to show how the readings are part of the whole message of the Bible. As I love reading the Bible I also love this style of preaching.

Best of all he says the Latin Mass for us. Deo Gratias for Fr Tom.

Besuty 2

Is there anything more beautiful than getting up before sunrise and praying to the almighty and eternal God? I don't think so. The silence, the stillness, the lone candle flckering - and you alone with God (apart from your guardian angel and the saints that is). What a blessed time.

Beauty 1

I am haunted by a longing for beauty. How can I get more beauty in my life and is right to long for it? Can a Christian lead a beautiful life when the ugliness of sin - both mine and others - intrudes so much? Should we want beauty?

I'm going to make it my aim and will keep you posted.

The Latin Mass (again)

I went to the Latin Mass again today. It's only held once a fortnight in this area but how I love it! The reverence, the silence...with just the priest and altar server speaking quietly, the peace and joy. Words cannot express it. And our beloved priest, Fr T, speaks very frankly to us about the way we should live as Christians. He has told us he couldn't be so open at a parish Mass as people would be offended. Today he told us bluntly that we had to be Christ to a fallen world and explained what that meant. Very challenging and quite scary, so we try and we pray to the Holy Spirit.

THank you Jesus for the Blessed Latin Mass.

Offering up

For several weeks now I have been quite ill which is a novel experience for me. As I was being admitted to hospital the nurse said incredulously "At your age you've never had a general anaesthetic before?" and I answered "I've never even been in hospital before." (Even my babies had been born at home, and were very easy births) We agreed I had been very 'lucky'("blessed" I said to myself). So this was my first experience of 'offering up' my pain to God for others, I'd read about it, and knew how important it was but I'd never had the chance to actually do it before. And I was rather disappointed when I did. I don't know what I expected...an easing of the pain? ...a feeling of peace?...I don't know. But whatever I expected it didn't happen; the pain was just as bad, there was no lessening of my distress, I was still as scared. But in faith I believed that I was helping some priest somewhere. Praise God.

Sacred Heart.

As June is the month of the Sacred Heart I decided to add this beautiful prayer to my daily prayers. I say it often during the day: 'Jesus, meek and humble of heart, make my heart like unto thine.'

Such a blessing from the vast treasury of our Church.

Dreams

I'm thinking of writing a book for parents about how to introduce children to the Mass, starting when they are very small. Is it a dream or a plan? I'm not sure at the moment. I'm just praying for God's guidance and playing around with ideas. If it's a dream it'll fade: if it's God's Will a plan will emerge. As with everything prayer is the key.

Alleluia!

My friend Joan was teaching at the Children's Liturgy on Sunday and asked her class of 4 year olds "What does resurrection mean?" and one little girl leapt to her feet and said excitedly "It means He bees risen!" I love that.

Alleluia!

Stations of the Cross

My lenten penance was to pray the Stations of the Cross after the weekday Masses. So I wait until everyone, well, almost everyone, has left the church then I say them. I have found a beautiful meditation booklet to use and the stations have really spoken to me and helped me to be more honest with God and with myself. And of course I am even more aware of the sufferings of Jesus.

My daughter recently mentioned the old Protestant hymn "When I survey the Wondrous Cross" and I've incoporated that (silently) into my meditations too. I use the final verse at the Station where Jesus dies on the Cross:

"Were the whole realm of nature mine,
That was an offering far too small.
Love so amazing so divine
Demands my life, my soul, my All.

So moving.